I am...

This weekend, I attended, for the first time, the National Hands and Voices Conference for my work. I am a parent guide for Ga Hands and Voices- Guide by your Side program.  Here are the links to further explain what I am doing on this new journey.  http://www.handsandvoices.org/  and  http://www.gahandsandvoices.org/Guide_By_Your_Side.html . I took away many concepts from the conference.  I found it fascinating to be in the minority.  Many participants communicated with American Sign Language.  All modes of communication were represented: hearing/signing ASL, Deaf/signing, deaf/signing, deaf/spoken language, hearing/spoken language, hearing/signing/spoken language and so on. We even had moms from Russia come, so that makes it;  Russian sign/ASL/ hearing/deaf/Deaf/spoken English/spoken Russian. I am probably confusing everyone at this point...the ultimate point though is I was in a room full of different languages/modes with a unifying fact. We all came to bond and learn from each other around the topic of Deaf/Hard of Hearing children/families. Even though we all had different stories in the room, I found myself identifying with the group and being reflective.  I remember particularly one moment sitting at the table and I internally said to myself, "I am a parent of a HOH child." It was if my brain was processing it for the very first time. That seems shocking since Amelia is almost 5 years old.  She has been doing exceptionally well.  She is mainstreaming, and her hearing aids have been effective. Our family and friends have all made hearing loss a "normal" part of life. For that I am grateful, because it has helped us.  However, the conference helped bring me back to reality.  My children (Colin and Amelia) have hearing loss.  I need to make sure I am an advocate for them!  I learned about some research and great strategies on the topic of advocacy.  However, learning it and living it are to different things, which leads me to the next story.  I wish I could have captured it on video so you could really get a better sense of this impactful moment of the conference.  I will try to paraphrase and recap below: 
It was the closing remarks of  this weekend's conference. One of the conference attendees came all the way from Africa. Her name was Jackie. The National President of Hands and Voices got up to thank her for coming and asked her to take the podium. (paraphrasing here is what Jackie said)- 'When I arrived Friday night, I was filled with excitement to meet all of you. That night I went to my room alone, and sat down and cried. I said to myself how I am going to tell them? How am I going to get them to understand what is happening in Africa?' Jackie stopped talking and began sobbing on stage. The room started filling with crying from all of us. I knew a little of what she was about to say, but I knew that I was about to get slapped in the face with a detailed reality of what was happening in Africa to kids that were born deaf/HOH. She struggled through her tears with the next powerful statement.  'I am only one person, how am I going to help all these kids? It is taboo to be born deaf in Africa.  The culture believes that they are possessed by the devil/evil.  They are institutionalize...taken away from their families...they get to see them three times a year...we have to hide our children if we want to keep them. I have learned many things at this conference.' She went on to say that she has hope and that she is ready to go back and make a difference.  After that emotional moment, the "naming circle" took place. We each got to go to the microphone and speak the names of our deaf children.  We formed a circle and joined hands and lifted them up.  Symbolically, lifting the load we carry for all families of deaf/HOH and standing united to make a difference. 
I titled this post, " I am" and put in bold this powerful phrase throughout this post.  We must come to grips with who we are, what we stand for, what we have become, how we define ourselves, and how the world defines us. We need to make sure we are also striving to be what we want to be and make a difference. To spread the word on advocacy, children's rights, world injustices. To stand up, even if we are only one person, like Jackie felt, and change the world. Who are you? "I am...
Scarlett Giles
p.s. will post pics later